last week was prolly one of the worst weeks of my life.
thank god that's over.
i know that while some mistakes are much too fun to make only once,
the mistakes made over the past week were waaaaaaaay too exhausting to make more than once.

anyway...
since all that drama has been pushed out of the way and i already have a smiling cow as a peace offering, i can focus on the lighter side.
well.
interesting week.

myth #1:
saturday morning i read a message from one of my friends asking me if i was and if so, congratulating me for being pregnant.
the subject was: CLARIFICATION
ohwow. ahahahahahahahahahaha!
i couldnt stop laughing because i had my period that day. and me? pregnant? that was just waaaaay too absurd. :p
i first got interrogated about this by the OMs and LMs plus the agents of my account in Sitel. because i was suddenly resigning.
but this time i was hearing it from a friend waay back in eTel.
really? how? :p
i mean, are there other people who think so?

yes, i am pregnant, i've been to atlantis, i have a unicorn for a pet, and i am the queen of the philippines. oh yeah, im getting a flying pig for christmas.
seriously, if i am, id tell everyone cause i like getting gifts and having parties thrown for me. :D
yes, i am opportunistic and materialistic. :p

myth #2
just this week, a couple of friends have told me to consider the fact that i am "a high-maintenance type of gf".
come to think of it, people keep telling me that.
whenever my friends and i play the if-you-were-a-guy-would-you-go-for-me game,
come to think of it, even my guy friends bluntly tell me this,
i never never get picked because im too high maint and maarte.
well, im not. (ive lost the im-not-maarte battle)
i dont need to be taken cared of and watched over all the time.
hey, last wednesday i went to megamall(!) on my own and watched a testosterone-y movie (and enjoyed it!) alone.
ive also learned to let the little things pass...ish.
and i do not throw a lot of tantrums anymore.

basta, ive improved on so many levels.
haha i believe so. :p
basta basta. ask mark. diba?!
again, absurd.
so myth busted.

myth #3
my mother, while rearranging my room (while i was inside sleeping), woke me up and told me that she will not be getting me any more clothes and shoes until 2009.
she further claims that i would be able to get through 3 months without having to repeat any item of clothing that i already have.
she says i have too much stuff and too many flip flops when i should be wearing heels.
is she kidding me?
we spent the whole day labeling my shoeboxes (no shopping today because of that UAAP whatsit), rearranging the furniture in my room and her wanting to discard my havs.
my mom doesnt understand that it only looks like i have plenty of stuff.
BUT.
that's because my closet space is small.
plus compared to... say my achis, i actually have less.
and my stuff are definitely cheaper.
so, no. iont have enough to last me til 2009.
(i told you im materialistic!)

there you go.
busting myths since 2am!
join me next time as i-
yeahyeah, i definitely watch too much TV.

i realized, much to my dismay and delight, that i want to write again. so what if a delusional ex boyfriend posts crazy shit about me all over cyberspace?

so what, right?

so yeah...

i went back to my old saaaaad layout. lol. but now its orange-y.

i'm supposed to meet anj and via tomorrow at up. but no plans were finalized, so instead i'ma be there 11ish with bags, because i'veta go home and catch some sleep before i go to work. might catch alvin there as well so bahala na si batman.

my pink razr is giving up on me. it would hang while i'm typing text messages. other than that, it's fine. i hope i'd be able to have it fixed tomorrah. i can't really text properly... kaya sorry to those na hindi ko mareplyan. very wrong-timing mag drama ang cp ko.

i might as well daw kill myself sabi ni kristoff. =p hmmph. and right now he's drinking to celebrate his off. hrrr.

some random thoughts:

*i really crush sir alwin. he is in japan with his wife. who has smaller eyes and bigger brains than i do. ay talo! :p hehe.

*i'm a bit annoyed with the happenings today. or lack thereof. haha. either way, i slept annoyed, i woke up annoyed and i'll prolly be annoyed until tomorrow. we'll see how it goes.

*i'm sleepy again... or maybe its just the weather. stupid weatherman.

yella sent me this, she musta got it from little manhattan. =)

love is not about ridiculous little words.  love is about grand gestures.  love is about airplanes pulling banners over stadiums.  Proposals on jumbotrons, giant words in skywriting.  love is about going that extra mile even if it hurts.  letting it all hang out there.  love is about finding courage inside of you that you did not even know was there.

huh.

did you see the da vinci code? iono why some fans of the book are being negative about the movie. i mean, we get to see paul bettany's ass (the albino monk, Silas) 3 times in the first ten minutes or so. i do believe he has to bare his butt in every movie he stars in (hello, wimbledon?). mmm..

although i do admit that the movie got a tad boring around the end (alec insists i got bored because silas had died by that time. like, whatev) and there were a number of diversions from the book.

i am just bothered because this is the first time i noticed a guy's ass and liked it. and he had to be a Powder v2. dear me. i must be a freak.

+++++++++++

yesterday we had a spur-of-the-moment lunch date with via, boom and anj. alec and i explored gateway (it is not everyday we get to go to cubao, after all) and to our utter disappointment, there were no fun stores around (mango is not appealing as of the moment- i'm so poor). but i'm going back because they have caco galhardo cartunistas there. and xoxo. oh my heart. torture, that's what it is. alanis was right: its like meeting the man of your dreams and then meeting his beautiful wife. or in my case, not being able to afford him (caco galhardo is a brazilian painter).

anyways, i missed them. anj got a haircut and via was wearing a sleevelss top. my, my.

+++++++++++

it really is unfair how trusting people can be such a huge issue after a small blip in one's life. i never realized this but i've developed serious trust issues over the past couple of years. i do believe i've reached my all-time low: i'm now checking alec's phone whenever we see each other and i'm not letting him go out with other people, at least, not willingly.

i don't know what's wrong with me. i mean, i know i've a lot of loose screws, but this. this is just psychotic. next thing i know i'd be like loves- deleting names from his phonebook, demanding his utter obedience and resorting to physical abuse (she IS an expert hehe). it may work for other people, but i don't want to be like that.

it's a year and a half and i'm still doubting. i don't like that i've the memory of... what is that animal that doesn't forget? crap, how ironic that i claim to not forget and forget what animal it is that doesn't forget. erm.. anyway, the point is, i don't forget the mistakes, the few scattered lies and the blanks in between. and i have a wild imagination, so you can leave me alone for an hour and when you get back its either i'd be so entertained i won't notice you (sabi nga ni benjo) or i've conjured a thousand scenarios in my sick little head and aawayin na lang kita bigla (poor alec).

hay. americans have colonized and happily fucked my brain.

i'm watching american idol and then this kotex commercial comes up and i was thinking, "this is definitely the worst commercial for this month" if you want to know, last moth, it was Unif(?), the drink endorsed by Paolo.. whatshisface? the host of extra something [gawd, i'm really out of touch with reality]. and then i switch the channel to GMA and see Mel Tiangco standing beside the boxer Veloria (?).. ohgee. it looked weird. she was bigger than the boxer, i mean she lookied like she could poke him and he'd fall on his face. it was actually scary.

forgive my evilness. i had a tiring day, alec's sick, i don't have any more money. as in zero, i paid a thousand bucks for my sun bill and it still hasn't been reactivated.

scratch that, i'm having a draining week.

monday sucked. it sucked being back with a lot of people who had no idea. it was a smile-laugh-talk-repeat-cycle day. i wanted to sleep. i was soooo tired. i wanted to sleep for a year. but i couldn't.

tuesday sucked. tons of happy people. people who said they were sorry. but they really weren't. how would they know? do they know how tita suffered? how she was bloated because her organs stopped functioning way before her heart stopped beating? how it was just me and love with dead peole inside the place where they ask you if your dead's make-up is okay. how the fuck could it possibly look okay when she's not breathing and she's lying inside a box with glass so people could peer into her face?

wednesday... was better. love wanted me to see her. i wanted desperately to see her. i wasn't listening in class, i barely noticed myself going through the answers to two quizzes. we spent half of the day with her and makus. then we visited tita's resting place. it still sucked, though. we had to go home right after because i had to make my ppt for anthro.

today sucked. although it felt nice to spend time with yels and charls.

i'm guessing the following days would continue to suck until i find a way to release my grief. until i get to mourn properly. i don't want to mourn, whenever i see my best friend do the things her mom used to do, or whenever she does things alone that she used to do with her mom, it breaks my heart. i know she knows i'm here for her. but it isn't enough. it can never be enough. every time i see my mom, i have this urge to cry and hold her hand and not let go, i'm afraid i might blink and then she'd be gone.

death is an absurd concept. the more you think about it, the more you dwell on it, the more you write about it, the less real it becomes and the harder it is to let go. the less you think about it, the less you want to move on. there must be some way out, i just don't know how i'll deal with it yet. i can't cry, but i feel heavy all the time...
...think about how loves feels... argh.

i guess i hate everyone because... well... they're alive.

screwed up i know.

it has been the longest week of my life.

and prolly the saddest.

tita was buried yesterday morning, i think she's suffered long enough.

now i'd hate to face the world and go outside to see a bunch of people who don't know what we've gone through and we're going through. it'd be too weird, especially for me. am not much for small talk.

plus am a week delayed with my requirements. grrr.

*sigh*

i'm tryina go on a chocolate-induced high. unfortunately, not even the biggest toblerone can do the trick.

i woke up kanina with a lot of messages and missed calls from Loves and Makus. i thought they were fighting again but as it turns out, love's mom, tita joy, has been in a motorcycle accident and she's in the icu. to say that this day has been a HARD day is an understatement. we practically spent the whole day (alec, makus and i, along with loves and her dad and sibs) in medical city sa icu waiting area. aina and hen got there around i'm used to spending days sa medcity, what with my sister's eye ops and my mom and kuya's allergies... but this time it was different because no one knew what to do about the problem and no one knew when it'll be fixed.

tita joy's skull was fractured and she's not responding.. they won't operate because it just can't be done. i went in to see tita kanina... i just. iono. tita joy's like a mom to me, i've known her since i was a nursery student and she's so young and barkada namin sya eh... i am praying for a miracle, we all are. its just been a day... i hope things get better tomorrow..

my best friend is doing everything because her dad's in shock. i feel bad about not being awake pa when she was looking for me kasi kanina pa sabi ni makus hinahanap na ko ni loves. i just wish i could do more than be with her and try to make her laugh. she's trying to be strong for everyone, kasi even her tito's in shock. plus her two younger brothers are confused and scared... she hasn't eaten since yesterday.

my whole fam's also affected, my mom has been nursing a headache since kaninang umaga and i know she's been praying nonstop.

i apologize sa mga tao na di ko nareplyan, sa meetings na di ko na-attendan. tomorrow same shit din.. sorry, sorry. i just have to be with my sis right now. please, whoever it is you pray to, please ask him/her to spare my sister's mom... i don't know what her family would do without her.

got na my gold summer havs!!! *clapclapclap* they arrived today from havaianasus.com wrapped in pink tissue paper inside a havs plastic bag. oooooohhhh the smell of rubber. i loooooooooooooove!!! i looooooooooove!!! on the other hand, since i paid nun pa, i'm pooooooor i'm poooooooor!

buti na lang may good thing today. i am sooo having a sucky, drama-filled day. *sigh*

today is my mommeh and daddeh's 31st anniversary. yes, kate is almost 31 na. :p hmm... feb sila kinasal, november pinanganak si achi... hey! excatly 9 months!! wow. :p

hee. :) i've a chinese piglet from disneyland HK!! :D fcuk, zara and esprit shirts plus an hk coke for adrian. hehehe. not on sale na eh. sa august na lang ulit. :D

off to clean biger hamster cage then thesis pa! Grr.

crap may feminist philo pa pala kong outline. aarghhh..

I am having a crappy day. Not really. :D I'm actually having an okay day. What's an okay day?, you might ask. Well, an okay day is a day wherein you go to all your classes because you might not have any "-laude" on your name when you graduate and you wake up in the morning suddenly threatened that you might not graduate at all.

An okay day is when you come to your PanPil19 class unprepared and you find out that there's a graded recitation and you jumble words, pass them for an explanation and what do you know? Your professor agrees with the crap you just invented. *grins*

An okay day is when you have lunch at 9 in the morning because you're unusually hungry. And you get chocolate chip cookies from your friend.

An okay day is when things are going your way and nothing seems to be wrong.

See, an okay day is when everything's going right, yet something is missing and nothing just can't make everything perfect.

KESOKESOKESO!! Keso Republic na kasi ang tambayan namin at nagiging Cheesy na rin ako.

*pukes*



*LOL*

Don't worry, I doubt Sadako might get out. If she does, whack her with a Pan or a Baseball Bat or a Chair or something. We're not THAT helpless little creatures.

Call me if Daniel Radcliffe suddenly gets out, though. Too delicious to miss. :D

Gusto Kita, Natatakot Ako
Danton Remoto

Hindi dahil sa malaki ka at balbas-sarado
Nilapitan mo pa rin ako

Hindi dahil may asawa ka na at mga anak
At ginusto mo pa rin ako

Kundi dahil para sa akin ang ganda ganda mo
Nawawala ako. [love this line!]

Gusto kita, natatakot ako
Hindi dahil sa ang ganda-ganda mo, nawawala ako
Nagkikita naman tayo

Hindi dahil may syota ka na
Babae naman siya at lalake ako
At magkasama pa sa trabaho

Kundi sa unang pagkakataon, ginusto kita
Kahit lalaki ka
Babae ang gusto mo
Nababalewala ako.

***
Cool, ne? In case you haven't noticed, it's gay lit. But there's something general about it that makes it a cool poem.

Hmmm.. I watched Monsters Inc. last night [150 bucks na lang orig eh!] and it was superb. My brother couldn't stop laughing so he was, like, getting the Doritos everywhere.. ang kalat tuloy. :p I like the name "Boo". I remember na there used to be a time when my sis calls her ho whe "Boo" [maybe dahil sa song na "My Boo"]. Well, whatever. Blabbing random thoughts is okay, right?

I was supposed to study during the weekend but I kept getting interrupted. So diba, I didn't go to the dentist na cuz I said I was going to study? but then, Makus came by and biglang napalaboy tuloy kami.. We just made ikot sa mall while munching on gummi candies.

And then nung Sunday, my two sisters and I went to Elvie's para magpa-facial. I'm a person who doesn't really have a big personal bubble [the space you allow other people to get near], I've always been touchy-okay-lang-kahit-hatak-hatakin-mo-buhok-ko-at-sampal-sampalin-mo-hands-ko type [with my friends]. Anyways, there were also two women having a facial and they were talking and my sis and I were talking to. Turns out na Chinese din yung two girls, so everytime my sis says "Shobe" pareho kami napapatingin nung other girl, same goes with me It was funny, cuz at first they were talking about money and of course, they thought no one at the place could understand them.. but I couldn't help but smile kasi I eavesdropped without meaning to. *grins*

Speaking of Chinese, I was annoyed at my Achi last Saturday cuz she kept pushing me to one of my Ahiya's best friends [who's Chinese]. She even wanted to give my number to him. If I know any better, I'd say she has a crush on him! Kasi she kept going on and on about him even if I wasn't listening na.

Am I a snob? I mean, sure, I don't go walking grinning at other people, pero I'd look stupid naman if I don that, diba? Kasi people I know na nadadaanan ko sa hall always shout "Isnabera!!" after me. Am not!

Am I coño? There's a friend of mine who always says "Shit, coño talaga!!" every time I speak. Eh sino ba naman capable of speaking in straight tagalog? Wala naman eh. Right?

::nudges seatmate::

It's an okay day, I suppose.

Nothing to dread, nothing to look forward to.
Nothing to avoid, nothing to look for.
Nothing negative, nothing positive either.
Noth-

Waittaminute..

Someone's playing "In Your Eyes". Crappy song if you ask me. Why the hell would they even want to play that?! Don't they know it's distracting?


God, I miss him.


*pouts*

Wut-ever!

*does that W thing with her hands and rolls eyebrows*

Cheesy mode is obviously off.

Guess what? I'm a Krafty Kisser!! LOL! :D

I think I'm more of a Kute Kisser than a Krafty one.

I remember my first kiss.. OMG. It was soooo funny!! I was in first grade and I had this classmate who's psychotic.. neurotic... [or something to that effect] and he kisses all the girls in the room.

See, everytime the bell rings for dismissal, he stands at the door and plants everyone a huge, slobbery kiss on the cheeks. Not one girl dared to stand up to him. I didn't intend to whack him, but I didn't intend to be kissed by him, either! So when he tried to kiss me, I *accidentally* slapped him square on the face. Ooops. Bad reaction to a stimuli.

Hmmm.. that was the first time I got called to the principal's office, too!! LOL! Hahaha.. But I think, he made sure to skip me the next time he kissed my classmates goodbye.

What is it about kissing anyways? I mean, I know it's nice and all that... but who the heck invented kissing as a form of showing affection? You could get sick if you kiss the wrong person, for godssakes! Okay, so it would be *stupid* to kiss the wrong person. But why kissing? Why not... say.. I dunno..

And why is there a French Kiss? I mean, Filipinos do it [and we do it pretty well! NOT from experience, okay?].. So there should be a Filipino Kiss, right? And if there's a tongue involved, then it shouldn't be called Kissing.. should be called Tongue-tying or something like that.

Jeez.. I shouldn't even be raising these questions.

I like kissing.

You like kissing.

The bottom line is...

Everyone likes to kiss.


Who cares where it came from? Who cares what it's called? As long as you do it right, it doesn't really matter. LOL!! :))

My high temperature is really getting to me. I am so whacked this morning that I didn't know what I was doing. I practically changed my clothes thrice! Ugh. And I just dumped everything I own in my bag without thinking what I was doing. This is insanity.

Hey, The Rockets beat the Kings by i dunno, almost 20 points..? People all over are now probably singing the stupid Yao Ming theme song [Have you heard it? All it says is 'Yao Ming! Yao Ming!']. I don't have anything against the big guy. It's actually cool that talented Asians are getting the exposure they [we?] deserve. And he's really tall. That must account for something. The Kings are good, so the Rockets must've been playing well that day. I just really hope the Lakers don't win again. Kobe's cute and really great, but he has to lose and go back down to earth sometime. :D *whispers* He's too mayabang.

I'm looking for lyrics to PNE's song "This Guy's In Love With You Pare" [Or something like that] for my PanPil19 [yes, I do attend my classes, thankyouverymuch] homework. I can't find it! My hands are very cold and itchy. And speaking of which, I am allergic to everything. What is it with me and allergies? Practically the moment my mom let me out of her ..uh.. eherm... I was getting allergies. She said I was so red and round I could pass for a Queso de Bola. I take that it's not a compliment.

Speaking of my mom, God, sometimes I just want to ask her to please keep quiet for a day. Grabe... from my eating habits [I ate chocolate pancakes and squid balls for dinner last night] to the text messages I get [she reads my phone!!]... she wouldn't stop commenting on everything! And her reason is that youngest daw kasi ako. Yeah, right.

Brrr... I'm feeling really cold. And sleepy. My eyes aren't fully open [kelan ba?!]. I just don't feel like doing much at all.

I just want to lie in bed and snuggle with my pillows and dream about a place without homework and papers.

I've never really gotten what's the big deal behind Valentine's Day. Am I dense? or just thick-skulled? Right after the sun sets on January 1, people start hanging hearts and cupids and whatnots just about everywhere. Argh. Gag me.

You're probably thinking that I'm a heartless, sarcastic, cynical girl who's probably never been in love before, [which is partly true- the sarcastic part lang!] but that just isn't the point. The point is that why do people tend to make such a big deal out of VDay? I'm not against love and showing your affection and all that cheesy stuff, but the tendency is that people only remember to show all of these on Valentine's Day. Supposedly, it's a day to celebrate, God, what else but Love [or as batch twooth calls it: Loooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuvvvveeeeeeeeeee] and that's cool with me. But what about on other days? The days before VDay? The days after it? Are we going to be less affectionate just because it isn't Valentine's Day?

The point is [Yes, there's a point to all these blabbings], VDay or not... love is still love [exactly what love is, I HAVE NO IDEA. :D]. The feeling must not be heightened nor lessened just because of the occasion.

Hearts and cupids in the environment must not be driving factors for a guy to start declaring his eternal [yeah, right] love [really?!] and devotion [totoo ba yan..] to a girl even if it's not the right time and they're not even right for each other. Yung tipong nape-pressure lang cia just because *that* time of the year has come. Hapit, in layman's terms.

Neither should VDay be a source of terror for people who do not have [sorry for the cheesy term] sweeties. Valentine's day isn't all about romance between two people. It can also be about friendship and family. Basta in any relationship that involves love. Haha, my Yuri pairing Mistress Rea said, "To Hell With Valentine's Day!", although it IS a darn good quote, I must say that it isn't so bad. It's just another ordinary day for singles. And just another day to be sickeningly [eew] sweet for couples. Don't think you're the only person in this planet who wouldn't get some dose of snuggling this VDay, as Hugh Grant remarked, "...Why? Have you met the rest of the planet?" *grins* But, really... for some of us, VDay is just another day that would probably start with all the love-sick people and would end like any other bloody day [tired and hungry]. [Sarcastic Krissy is resurfacing]

Okay, okay, seriously [was I ever serious?!]... Jason and I were talking just now and sabi ko sa kanya, 'Hey, batch twooth has a date on VDay ah? Sa Fair natin. Everyone has to wear black and anyone who has a significant other will be executed and left to die in the wilderness.' *LOL* and he said that I shouldn't be wearing black and I might be executed. Hmmm.. not a bad point. And to think I was the one who initiated this.

*baka yarou!*

***
When Love met Madness

A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot
on it for the first time, virtues and vices wandered bored, not
knowing what to do.
One day, they were all gathered and bored more than ever when
Ingenious had an idea: Why don't we play hide and seek? And all of
them liked the idea, and immediately the mad Madness shouted: I want
to count, I want to count and since no one else was crazy to seek
for Madness, Madness leaned on a tree and started to count, 1, 2, 3.
And as Madness counted, the vices and virtues went hiding.
Tenderness hung on the horn of the moon; Treason in a pile of
garbage; Fondness curled up between the clouds; Lie said he would
hide under a stone but he lied and hid at the bottom of the lake;
Passion went to the center of the earth; Avarice entered a sack that
he ended up breaking....
And Madness continued to count, 79,80, 81,82.
All the vices and virtues were already hidden by then, except for
Love, whom as undecided as he is, did not know where to hide. And
this should not surprise us because we all know how difficult it is
to hide Love.
And Madness was already at 95, 96,97.and just at the moment when
she arrived at hundred, Love jumped into a rosebush and there he hid
out. And Madness shouted "I'm coming! I'm coming!" and as she
turned, the first one she saw was Laziness, thrown to her feet
because he didn't have any energy to hide.
Then she saw Tenderness in the horn of the Moon, and Lie at the
bottom of the lake, and Passion in the center of the earth...
Discovering them one by one, finding all of them but one. Madness
was getting desperate, unable to find the last missing one, until
Envy, envious for not having been discovered, whispered to
Madness: "You are lacking Love, and he is hiding in the rosebush."
And Madness took a wooden pitchfork, and stabbed at the rosebush,
and stabbed and stabbed, till a heartbreaking shout made her stop.
And, after the shout, Love came out covering his face with his
hands, and from between his fingers run two threads of blood, out of
his eyes.
Madness anxious to find Love had took out Love's eyes with the
pitchfork. What have I done?, what have I done? - she shouted. I
have left you blind! How can I repair it? And Love answered, you
can't restore my eyes. But if you want to do something for me, you
could be my guide.

From that day on, Love is blind and is always accompanied by
Madness.


***

Cool, ne? Thanks Nikki-chan for posting this in our ML. Makes SO MUCH sense. Ha-ha.

I'm feeling better now. The floor isn't spinning anymore. That's a good thing, right JP? LOL.

If anyone ever asks me for Tikoy ever again, I swear, I'll put that person's lights out!!

Even my professor in Speech100 asked me for tikoy! And my classmate suddenly said, "Wait, kala ko hapon ka!"

Huuuwaaaaaaaatttt?!!

Talaga, I don't like it when people ask me that question. :p HINDI AKO JAPANESE O CHINESE O KOREAN.

I could hear JP [Oi ikaw ang chekwa eh!] and everyone else protesting while reading this. Really, I'm as pinoy as anyone gould get.

Anyways, I don't like tikoy one bit. Really. You guys could have those [lots of] square, red boxes in our ref. Mabubulok lang yun dito. *phew*

I haven't drank a single drop of coffee for a whole week!! *grins* Isn't that cool?! I'm not addicted!!

*dances around happily*

JP, you should be proud of me! LOL.

Speaking of addictions... Yes, Nikki-chan was telling me how she was discovering that a person could be addictive. Hell, yeah!! It's a weird feeling. Like, you couldn't get enough of that person. Even when s/he's around. Lalo na when s/he's NOT around!! Actually, it's not a bad kind of addiction, it's more like.. man, I dunno. It's a good feeling. Especially when reciprocated.

***
For Nikki [adik], Kinomoto [in love] and Anesca [windang] [hayok daw ako eh!]:

Hinahanap-Hanap Kita
RiverMaya

Adik sa yo, awit sa akin

Nilang sawa na sa aking mga kuwentong marathon

Tungkol sa yo at sa ligayang

Iyong hatid sa aking buhay

Tuloy ang bida sa isipan ko'y ikaw.

Sa umaga't sa gabi

Sa bawat minutong lumilipas

Hinahanap-hanap kita

Hinahanap-hanap kita

Sa isip at panaginip

Bawat pagpihit ng tadhana

Hinahanap-hanap kita.

Sabik sa yo kahit maghapon

Na tayong magkasama't parang telesine

Ang ating ending

Hatid sa bahay n'yo

Sabay goodnight, sabay me-kiss

Sabay bye-bye.

Sa umaga't sa gabi

Sa bawat minutong lumilipas

Hinahanap-hanap kita

Hinahanap-hanap kita

Sa isip at panaginip

Bawat pagpihit ng tadhana

Hinahanap-hanap kita.

Sa school sa flag ceremony

Hanggang uwian araw-araw

Hinahanap-hanap kita

Hinahanap-hanap kita

At kahit na magka-anak kayo't

Magkatuluyan balang araw

Hahanap-hanapin ka

Hahanap-hanapin ka. :)

I'm really worn out this week. This is, like, the first time I've been exerting [not much, though] effort on my Acads.. and I find the rush kind of good. Parang it's coming back to me.. I'm feeling the drive again [cguro tamang drive na yung mag-flunk ng Bio test, diba?!]

I hope this pushes through the remaining sem. I *really* need to maintain my stat.

I'm too sleepy to make much sense. I haven't been sleeping enough these days. Time just doesn't seem to be enough.

Oh yeah, kung sino man yung nagpropose last Thursday morning... puhleaze, get a life.. and don't go leeching on mine.

1. Don't you think it's improper to do that at 4 in the morning and on a school day?! I *don't* get enough sleep at all!!

2. I don't even know you. You said that yourself. Napaka-absurd naman ng proposal mo.

Please. Spare me. ^_^ It's New Year's day for crying out loud!

OMG! I'm wearing black!!! BADBADBAD!!

*rushes off to change*

Aw, damn, I don't have any more red shirts!!

This is sooooooooo bad.

I woke up really early today. Pano kasi the freaking skylight was super bright. Plus it's only open on MY side!

*cusses*

Anyhoo, I got the chance to watch Two Weeks' Notice naman this morning [I watched Catch Me If You Can the night I had a Bio test] and I hafta say, it may be another one of those movies where the couple always end up together happily forever [which isn't a good thing if only such happenings do occur in real life!], but it was straight to the point and it wasn't all kissy-cheesy typical movie.

Speaking of which, Hugh Grant made it to the list of UK's poll on who they think should be the next Bond!! Really. He got two percent of the vote, I think. He's cute [Brit men have *this* kind of something that makes them so damn appealing] , but he's not Bond-ish!! BTW, it was Jude Law who got most of the votes. I guess I could see him as Bond. *shrugs*

It's such a lazy afternoon. All I want to do is sleep all afternoon and forget about the paper in Comm2 I'm supposed to hand in tomorrow, which I haven't even done anything on. Damn, blame it on the weather.

Mother was watching me kanina and then she suddenly remarked, "Krissy, are you aware that your legs are whiter than your face?" And I went, like, what?! And I looked, and it was soooooooo true!! I don't know whether to be happy that my legs look lighter than my face or to be bothered that my colors aren't coordinated! Hmmm.. this is indeed a disturbing situation. *ponders*

Yahoo! Messenger kinda sucks these past few days. The other night, I was online but batch twooth peeps thought I wasn't kasi sabi offline daw ako sa ML. Anesca couldn't connect the other night, either. Last night, JP couldn't connect to Y!M [I think, or I dunno if the problem's with his PC] either kaya we had to send PMs in order to talk [which was so bagal!]. And just now, Star and I are talking pero hindi cia shown online sa YM ni Nikki-chan. Nikki, on the other hand, was shown online pero she wasn't receiving any of our messages. This is insane. Plus we were also talking about how much SPAM we get on our Yahoo Mails. I hope this doesn't go on for long. I don't like interruptions like these. :p

Songs Currently Playing in my Mind

1. Bring Me to Life by Evenescence: I think OST ng Daredevil...

2. Paris by ChicoSci: Matagal na 'to, and I still find it cool.

3. The Game of Love by Santana feat. Michelle Branch: This is the kind of song you just can't get out of your head. :)

4. Somewhere Out There by Our Lady Peace: It's freakishly good.

5. Your Love by Kylie Minogue: All her songs are somehwat alike, but so infectious. My cousin told me she was voted the sexiest woman somewhere.. :) I have to agree with that.

6. So Into You by Tamia: Cute and cute still.

7. Psycho by Sytem of a Down: Grabe, whenever I hear this song, I couldn't help but do that headbanging thing. Really! Ask my brother, he'll agree with me.

Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho groupie coke
Makes you high makes you hide
makes you really want to go, STOP
Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho groupie coke
Makes you high makes you hide
makes you really want to think and stop
stop your eyes from flowing
Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho groupie coke
Makes you high makes you hide
makes you really want to go, STOP
Psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho groupie coke
Makes you high makes you hide
makes you really want to think and stop
stop your eyes from flowing out
so you want the world to stop
stop in and watch your body fully drop
from the time you were a
psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
so you want to see the show
you really don't have to be a ho
from the time you were a
psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
Psycho groupie coke
Makes you high makes you hide
makes you really want to go STOP
psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy
psycho groupie coke
do you really want to think and stop
stop your eyes from flowing out
so you want the world to stop
rushing to watch your spirit fully drop
from the time you were a
psycho, groupie, cocaine crazy
so you want to see the show
you really don't have to be a ho
from the time you were a
psycho, groupie, cocaine, crazy

*LOL*

Moving on... I got this message.

***
JOURNAL MESSAGE

FROM:
wag mo nang alamin...nagkikita naman tayo sa
2nd floor e...
EMAIL:
username@domain.com
DELIVERED:
Tue 1/28/2003 9:54 PM EST

MESSAGE:

Kekekekekekeke..... >_<
baaaad... baaaad...

The Goddess of...ehem...wrote:

Krissy's Conscience: Ooh.. nagpapalakas ka lang kasi lam mo
na saio mapupunta chekot nia pag nag work na cia eh!!

::Krissy ignores conscience::

Naughty talaga o!.... tsk tsk tsk...

***

Wait, wait, wait... sino ka? Batch Twooth ka rin, ciempre.. Kasi only you guys know and call me The Goddess of.... eherm... er... ano... *mumbles* Lust and All that is Naughty {Sssshhhh!].. :)

*grins*

Hahaha, Ping just claimed himself as The God Of.. what was it... Greed and Rape, if I'm not mistaken.. or something to that effect [Sex, Violence and/or Gluttony].

So tell me who you are and I'll give you tikoy as a reward. Anyone else who wants tikoy can have one from me. LOL. Just sick of the sight of tikoy. Hey, yeah, I think I'm supposed to be lucky this year! Yeah, right.

Quote for the moment:

No one said it was easy...
No one ever said it would be this hard...

[kanta 'to eh!]

Ho hum, pig's bum... I woke up at 8 in the morning to a loud banging noise and debris falling on my bedsheet. Turns out my dad had the workers change the roof on our [mine and Ate Issa's] skylight [our ceiling has this sliding window that opens para sa sunlight.. well, you get the picture! LOL] kasi it was too damn bright on mornings!

I don't have anything against bright, sunny days. But bright sunny days aren't welcome on weekend mornings when people like me just want to burrow under the covers and sleep all day long. Bah.

Anyway, it was good that I woke up [too] early because I had the chance to talk to my friend Angel. God, I miss her sarcasm and her cynical attitude na! Our talk was brief kasi she was in school [AdMU] doing a proposal of some sort..

Angel: Hey you.
Krissy: Hey! How's it going?
Angel: I'm okay. You?
Krissy: Things are going pretty well. How's school?
Angel: Hell. Yours?
Krissy: Ditto. Same here.
Krissy: We should meet for lunch sometime.
Angel: Yeah, lunch would be good.
Krissy: Mickey D's?
Angel: Sometime next week, okay?
Krissy: Yup.
Angel: Hafta go. Still have to do research for my brother. Take care.
Krissy: You too. Miss you na.
Angel: You too. God Bless. See you.

Yes, that's how we talk. And that's the sweetest we both could get with each other!! ^__^

OMG, I checked our room.. and it's BRIGHTER!!! Aaaaaaaaaaarggggghhhhhhhhhh.

Plus my star and teddy bear printed bedsheet's covered with i-don't-know-what!!! THIS IS NOT GOOD!!!!

*stalks off to kill the workers*

I just survived a test in SocSci1 that I didn't even study for. Awful awful awful. Oh, wait, did I say survive? I think I was supposed to say 'finished'. I don't even know if I passed the thing.

::crosses fingers::

Oh, I hope to God I will!!

Anyway, last Friday night.. after the meeting in the org, everything was really magulo.. as in I stayed up late thinking if I was gonna leave or not. The deal is, I don't have anything against anyone. But I want to remain with my co-apps who became close to me.

So now we're staying someplace else. But we're still eating the same food: Taho [although I'm allergic to it!], Sweet Corn, Cotton Candy and Footlong Sanwich!! While Grace reads our cards and gives us the lowdown on our fortune.

Speaking of which... hmmm.. here's the dirt on mine. There's a *girl* I'm close to.. and I'm having problems with her. These problems concern *her life* and it's cuz of that that there's conflict. Then there are two guys who are close to me [aside from THE guy] and I'm not sure what they're doing in my life.. There's money.. plenty of them [DAW. Asan?!?!] There's a guy who's THE GUY in my life.. and we're *pretty* close.. and... according to her cards, we are going to be...

Maybe I shouldn't continue. LOL!

Basta I know who the girl is. I know who the THE Guy is [obviously.] But I dunno who the others are. Whatever.

It was fun though. The way I went, 'Ohmigod, that is soooo true!!' whenever she says something about me.

Anyhoo... I'm supposed to go home in... ten minutes? Cuz my Ahiya wants to go home early today. Oh, damn, I just remembered I forgot my cards sa bagong tambayan namin. Mmm..

I hafta go. My brother's calling me!!

Arrgh. He must be REALLYYYYY tinatamad.

Just stood up from the tambayan because I've been sitting too long.. People are windang today.. even me [Yes, on most days I am perfectly normal. Yes. Me, normal. Topic closed for argumentation.]! I actually am a mixture of frustrated, bored, sleepy and sarcastic. I guess this is what you call one of those days.. you know.. that time of the month...?

*nudgenudgewinkwink*

Yeaaaaaaaaahhh... Ping Pong's Tigger was my stress reliever.. [Ooh.. that rhymes..] and I guess to make it short:

I am out of it today.

Haha..

So, let me put up my list of current obssessions:

1. Tobey Maguire: Yummyyumyum. What more could I say? Oh, yeah... Yummmmmyyyyyyy.

2. Lollipops: I dunno.. back in HS, I used to have a lolly for each subject.. At this rate, by the time I'm 20, I'll have seriously disgusting teeth.

*scary thought*

::pulls cherry-flavored lolly out of her mouth::

3. Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots by Flaming Lips: In case you were wondering, this is a song.. You have to hear it to believe me that it's infectious. Listen to NU 107 and be infected. ^_^

4. Ping's Bag and his Tigger keychain thingie: I dunno. I must be *really* crazy to punch poor, helpless Tigger. Ping winces everytime I do it, though. He must love his Tigger that much.

5. Footlong Sandwiches: OMG, feed me one of these [without the ketchup or the dressing ha!] and I could last for two days. Really!

Anyways, I am never coming back to the PC shop at SC Charls and I always go to. I have gotten myself a stalker. Isn't that cool?

NOT.

This guy knows how often I go to their shop and he kept asking me freaky q's a stranger wouldn't even dare to ask you. Imagine, he even had the guts to ask me if I was Chinese?! The nerve of that guy.[I hate it when people do that.] Plus he was reading my YMs [that's how he got my addy]... Eh I was talking to my ho whe. Sabi nung weird freaky guy nasa likod lang daw nia ko.. But I didn't dare look back, I wasn't interested in seeing him naman. Eew.

I think, I'm being punished for stalking guys before. But I was a good stalker [okay, bad excuse]! Plus I always find out that the guys I used to stalk liked me back, so no prob there, right?

Why me?! That's the place we go to kasi when everywhere else is packed.. Grrr..

It's cold in this lab.. My hands are frozen.

Plus I'm really out of it.

Caffeine is the answer.

Yes.

I feel like ranting over some things that don't even concern me. Yes, I am sarcastic today. Sarcastic and loving it. :)

Ever read the story "The Frog Prince"? Well, I don't blame the princess for not wanting to kiss the frog there. Who would want to? I mean, in real life, if girls have to kiss a hundred frogs just to find the one that would turn into a prince for them, then I think I know why a lot of women stay single for the rest of their lives.

And the mere fact that you have to kiss the frog for it to turn to a handsome, dashing, blah blah prince is questionable. I mean, why couldn't he just be a prince in the first place? I think this implies that men in general have to be given every chance in this world in order to prove their worth. Why not show their real selves even before we commit to them?

Plus there's also the artificiality of the situation. The princess wouldn't have kissed the frog if she wasn't forced to [or in other versions, if she pitied the frog.] I, for one, do not believe that pity=love. Or it could grow into something like that. If a person told you that s/he loves you, but in reality, just pities you... Diba that would be, like, a big insult to you? Sheesh.

Come on, fairy tales like these do not teach children the right values they're supposed to learn.

Kaya ako, when I have kids....

Ermm..

Scary thought.

Jan na lang tayo muna magtapos..

Haha.